Utah Vietnam War Stories

They came from every corner of Utah. From farms and ranches, college campuses and corner gas stations. From small crossroad towns, quiet suburbs and the heart of big cities.

Thousands of young men and women from every walk of life in Utah served during the Vietnam conflict. Almost 400 of them would never return.

For two generations the stories of those who served have seldom been heard. Some veterans fell silent in the face of an indifferent and even hostile reception when they came home. Other vets simply held their silence, choosing not to revisit the personal cost of war. The nation they served wrestled with its emotions, and too often found it convenient to forget the conflict, the controversy and the sacrifice.

Now, those voices will be heard.

Nearly 40 years after the end of U.S. military engagement in Vietnam, KUED (now PBS Utah) captures the powerful, poignant, funny and tearful memories of dozens of Utah's veterans in Utah Vietnam War Stories.
 

Drawdown, the conclusion of Utah Vietnam War Stories , is made possible through the support of the Katherine W. and Ezekiel R. Dumke, Jr. Foundation, and the George S. and Dolores Doré Eccles Foundation.

Part One: 1964 - 1967

Escalation

Part One of Vietnam War Stories follows a number of Utah's veterans who were sent to Vietnam during the crucial buildup phase of the conflict. Follow these vets as they describe how the bustling city of Saigon began to deteriorate in the wake of attacks on U.S. war ships in the Golf of Tonkin in 1964.

Utahans were among the first combat troops to set foot on the ground in Vietnam in 1965. As relations between the Communist North and the United States-supported South escalated slowly into full-scale civil war the U.S. shifted from a limited supporting force in the South into the leading role combating the North Vietnamese, all the while enduring a brutal guerrilla war in the South.

KUED (now PBS Utah) is proud to let the men and women who fought and lost friends and comrades finally tell their stories. It was a moment in time that would become a defining episode in American history, and in the lives of those who served.

Part Two: 1968 - 1970

Turning Point (excerpt)

For the men and women who served in Vietnam it was the signature sound of the war.

Whump...whump...whump.

The rhythmic thumping of helicopter blades could mean life or death. An assault deep in enemy territory or life-saving medical evacuation. Critical re-supply or a return to base and relative safety. Forty years after the war, Vietnam veterans have vivid memories of the moments of their lives played to the soundtrack of helicopters in action.

"You would look in their faces when you were taking them to a fire support base, or on a troop strike," recalls Terry McDade of Layton, Utah who served as a gunner and crew chief on a Marine Corps helicopter. "Are they going to be alive, or are they going to be dead?"

It forms one of the many gripping segments of Utah Vietnam Stories: Turning Point, the continuation of KUED's powerful documentary tribute to the men and women of Utah who served during the Vietnam conflict.

Built upon dozens of interviews with soldiers, sailors, airmen and medical personnel, Turning Point is a compelling oral history of the pivotal months in Vietnam during and immediately after the Tet Offensive of 1968. More than 500,000 Americans were serving in Southeast Asia at the time, and the surging, confusing nature of the conflict was fueling deep anti-war sentiment back in the United States.

"I didn't take it personal, these demonstrations," remembers Army Specialist Dennis Stevens of Kearns, Utah. Returning soldiers were treated indifferently, and sometimes with hostility, when they came home on leave. "It shouldn't be directed at us. But, in retrospect, who else would (protestors) direct it to? We were easy targets."

"Turning Point is not a military history of Vietnam," says program producer Sally Shaum. "At its best, it is a deeply personal statement by an incredible collection of men and women who served their country at a time of division and uncertainty."

Part of a seven year commitment by KUED to document the touching, searing and even humorous memories of hundreds of men and women who have served during times of war, Turning Point is the second in a three-part series dedicated to the Vietnam Era. Previously, KUED produced the landmark Utah World War Two Stories series creating almost ten hours of original programming chronicling Utah's role in every corner of the global conflict.

While Turning Point offers compelling stories from the battle lines of Vietnam, it also offers unforgettable portraits of moments away from the conflict. Few stories are more penetrating and touching than the recollections of the men and women who worked tirelessly to save lives in the middle of war. From battlefield medics to "evac" pilots to MASH surgeons to nurses serving in country and stateside, Turning Point offers tender moments of compassion in the most unlikely of settings.

"Never in my life have I taken care of patients who would say to me 'Ma'am my buddy is three beds down, he needs you more than I do. Go to him first'," remembers retired Rear Admiral Maxine Conder of the Navy Nurse Corps, pausing for a long moment to compose herself in the memory. "They were very special young men."

"While the programs themselves are powerful, the enduring contribution of our interviews with veterans is the creation of a long-overdue oral history collection," states KUED Director of Production Ken Verdoia. "Our efforts will preserve the contributions of more than two hundred 'average Americans' who served and sacrificed for their country. Their individual stories may be repeated in other settings, but these unique stories from Utah are far from commonplace."

The transcripts of all of the KUED veteran interviews are available on-line, either through the Utah Vietnam War Stories or the Utah World War Two Stories web pages.

Turning Point is the sights and sounds of a nation at war. The teeming streets of Saigon, where "every night was Friday night" in the memory of a retired Marine who was once a nineteen-year-old away from his Utah home for the first time. Temples dating back hundreds of years appearing in unlikely settings. Music they would never forget. And, always, the sudden certainty of war. A nation, a state and a generation remember a time when the world seemed to spin faster and life was held together by a slender thread. The music was loud. The helicopters louder.

Part Three: 1971 - 1975

Drawdown

The memories of the helicopter scout pilot whose life changed the minute he “saw the elephant” firsthand in Southeast Asia. The 17-year-old USO singer who thought the soldiers in her audience looked better suited to take her to the prom. The first tears of relief as a POW returned to his Utah home after five years of captivity and finally recognized, “I made it.”

These and dozens of other personal stories of the men and women of Utah who served in the conflict form the heart of Drawdown, the final chapter in KUED’s critically acclaimed, award-winning documentary series Utah Vietnam War Stories.

Focusing on the final, convulsive years of U.S. involvement in Vietnam, producers Elizabeth Searles and Sally Shaum fashion a powerful portrait of the last Utah residents to serve in the conflict. From the confusion of “Vietnamization”—an awkward transfer of power to the South Vietnamese so they would carry a larger share of the war effort—to the air war aimed at moving along the Paris peace talks, men and women from Utah’s big cities and small towns served in every corner during the final years of the war. As anti-war sentiment built at home, each soldier, sailor and pilot focused on doing their job and supporting their buddies. Many had a special vow, in the words of Air Force veteran David Chung of Cedar City, “not to be the last to die in Vietnam.”

“The memories and stories of the veterans are noticeably different in this conclusion of Utah Vietnam War Stories ,” says Producer Sally Shaum. Along with Elizabeth Searles and contributors Rick Randle and Geoff Panos, Shaum interviewed nearly 100 Utah veterans for the three-part series. “After the 1970s the men and women who serve are well aware of the absence of support at home,” Shaum continues. “They are at the end of a difficult war that will end in withdrawal. While proud of accepting the challenge to serve their country, the veterans featured in Drawdown are thinking of the cost.”

Among the most poignant moments in Drawdown are the memories of veterans returning from the battle zone. Vietnam represented a new era of returning from war, and soldiers could find themselves in jungle combat one day, and returning to their family two days later. Surviving the war brought a sense of relief to all. “The moment when the plane lifts off,” says veteran Lynn Higgins, “you are ‘wheels up’ and a cheer fills the air. A moment you never forget.”

But touching down in the homeland they dreamed of seeing could offer harsh lessons on the political conflict over the Vietnam War. Unlike World War II there were few—if any—welcome home celebrations. Soldiers were sometimes advised to change out of their uniforms before leaving the airport to avoid confrontations. While some veterans say their return to civilian life was seamless, others acknowledge they struggled for years to find a sense of home, connection and calm.

For veteran Tom Davis a return from war would begin a lifelong reflection on what he had seen and the price of service. “I am not bitter,” he says. “But there are times when I wonder what my life would have been like if I did not serve.” Davis would battle bouts of depression until connecting with support groups for veterans to share the lingering impacts of combat. “Even now there is an opportunity to get your life back,” offers Army veteran James Holbrook, “to gain control of your own story again.”

For Air Force Lt. Col. Jay Hess the return to his family and home in Kaysville was the realization of a dream that had kept him battling for survival over five grueling, tortured years as a POW. His Utah return was one of the few that produced a parade and cheers. But it meant little to the pilot until he crossed the doorway of his family home and tears filled his eyes. For the first time he was willing to admit it to himself. He was home. He had survived.

Q&A with filmmaker Sally Shaum, producer of Turning Point, episode 2.

These veterans have incredible stories. Can you relate one of your favorites?

Jeffrey Harris was assigned as an Army Psychiatric Medic.  He cared for psychologically traumatized young men coming out of the field.  These soldiers were diagnosed with what they identified then as Acute Situational Reaction—immediate combat stress.  Jeff was in a unique and difficult situation, overwhelmed with the responsibility of sending these boys back into the field after they were able to recompose and rest.  “I wanted somebody to help me.  I didn’t want this responsibility.  I’m in the position that people that I’m working with… I’m going to send them back quite often and some of them will die.”

For a long time it seemed like the public’s view of the Vietnam War was negative.  How do you think the public views Vietnam vets now?

I think today we can make the distinction between our feelings about a war versus the men and women who serve in that war.  I feel the public’s view is more open. Today we’re experiencing another turning point, and I think there’s a genuine need for us to understand that war, and understand the Vietnam Veteran’s experience.

How do you think politics affected Vietnam soldiers at that time, and how has the Vietnam War affected the political views of Vietnam vets today?

Some of those who served didn’t believe in the war, felt it was political blunder, and they didn’t want to be there, particularly the draftees.  They were counting the days until they could return to “the world.”  Others felt their country called them to serve, and it was their duty (and honor) to do so.  Many veterans believed the United States lost political will and pulled out of Vietnam prematurely.

In terms of veterans’ political views today, I feel it’s a mistake to stereotype or generalize the Vietnam Veteran—his/her political and religious views and lifestyle choices.  I will say that most of the veterans we interviewed passionately support the American troops returning from the Middle East.  “Never again!” they say.  “Never again will our boys be treated like we were treated.”  Our Utah Veterans are also very sensitive to today’s servicemen who suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.  They understand.  They know.

What do you think was the most difficult/traumatic part of the experience for soldiers (if you could narrow it down to one thing)?

I have to say that one of the most traumatic parts of the war experience took place at the end of their tour… in their own country.  Many painful coming home struggles can be heard in Utah Vietnam War Stories, episode three, which will be broadcast sometime spring of 2013.

Specific to this program, Turning Point, veterans speak of the difficulty of processing death all around them--buddies being killed, witnessing the “body count,” stacks of enemy dead, and the lingering pain in taking another life.  One veteran talks of the difficult moral dilemma within.  “Part of my duties as a missionary was to preach love and peace and harmony and Christian values… and here I was less than a year later and I was a paid professional killer.”  Another veteran talks of the unbearable stress of waiting for that first shot.  “I mean we all had upset stomachs.  And when a firefight happened, it was a release; actually it was a relief.”

Veterans coming out of this conflict experienced so many negative and traumatic things.  What are some positive things that Vietnam vets might have taken away from the experience?

A powerful relationship with fellow vets.  A bond with wartime buddies that only veterans can understand and feel.  A sense of who they are as men and women in service.  A sense of their capacities.   Recognition and gratitude for the Vietnamese people and their culture.  Unforgettable R&R (rest and relaxation) time.   Bootlegged tapes of incredible music, and a great appreciation for a firm mattress and a cold beer. 

Did making this documentary change your feelings about the Vietnam War? Did it enlighten you about anything that you maybe didn’t know about before?

This documentary confirmed my feelings about war in general.  A great deal of my job was to look through hours and hours of war footage.  For the most part, that wasn’t fun.  I feel enlightened through getting to know these men and women.  It was very difficult for some of these veterans to come forward, open up, and share their memories.  I just want to shout out a big THANK YOU to them. 

I also want to note that nurses played a very important role in the Vietnam War.  We interviewed five nurses who tell very compelling stories, with great compassion for the troops.  One nurse talks of feeling incredibly moved when guys from all over answered the call to donate blood for a fellow soldier. And that was the main goal for many of these guys; complete their tour and help each other get out of Vietnam alive.

How did making this documentary affect you?

Again, I feel a great sense of gratitude for the men and women who trusted me with their very touching and painful stories.  Producing this documentary also made me angry and sad knowing how long many of Utah’s Veterans have carried the burden of their Vietnam War experiences. 

Utah Vietnam War Stories Transcripts

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